Sunday, November 19, 2006

Thallium Poisoning!- Everything a Russian spy needs to know about Thallium


The alleged poisioning of KGB spy, Alexander Litvinenko with Thallium has prompted me to write this handy guide for spies on Thallium poisioning & what to do if you think you've had it.

Thallium is actually an ideal murder weapon as it is odourless & tasteless. Best of all, it decays after the victim has died. And unless you look specifically for it, its not something that's routinely tested for in hospitals or at post-mortems. Its effects are delayed & the victim can take weeks to die, thus making it hard to pinpoint a specific event or time of poisoning.

It has long been a way of getting rid of spies, political figures & dissidents particularly among the former Soviet bloc nations. It was even rumoured that there was a plot to poison Nelson Mandela with Thallium by South African agents when he was deemed a dangerous political prisoner.

Thallium salts irritate the stomach and intestines causing symptoms like abdominal colic, nausea, vomiting & diarrhoea. Then, numbness & tingling in the hands & legs develop. An intense pain which starts in the toes gradually spreads across the entire body. Your vision then starts being affected & a late sign is your hair falling out. By then, it might be too late!

The treatment is to vomit out the Thallium & to give yourself the antidote Prussian Blue which I promise you, is not avalilable over the counter! So you'd better turn up to your nearest casualty department pronto! Having said that, if you were to turn up to your local A&E saying you have been poisoned by spies, your're much more likely to get seen by the psychiatrist instead!!

But of course, should you need any help anonymously, the NHS Direct website is useful.... NOT! And NICE are yet to publish any guidance on the use of any antidote for Thallium.

Click here from a Russian version of this article
"I'm not certain of the answer to this question, let me think for a second". It was the first day of the MRCP course & it was one of the rare moments when our esteemed and knowledgeable lecturer was caught out.The silence was broken by a member of the audience, "I can tell you the answer!". Mr Egghead in the front row who proceeded to enlighten us in his thick Indian accent.

The rest of us stared open-mouthed in amazement. As Mr Egghead & our lecturer started a discourse which most of us couldn't follow, it was a very somber moment for the rest of the audience who hadn't done enough revision. Our exam was only 3 weeks away!

We had a mock test, at least I scored above average! The depressing thing was when I walked out after we finished at 7pm, I saw so many young people outside dressed nicely in their best night out clothes. I had forgotten it was a Saturday night. It was time to go home & drown my sorrows!